From my email inbox this morning…..
 A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , and talked with an old rancher.
He told the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.”
The rancher said, “Okay , but don’t go in that field over there…..”, as he pointed out the location.
The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, ” Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me !” Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.
“See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish…. On any land !!
No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear……do you understand ?!!”
The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores. A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull……  With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified. The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs…..
(I love this part….) “Your badge, show him your BADGE…….. ! !” This reminded me all too much of some religious conversations I’ve had. When I was so sure of everything I believed I spoke with authority and ventured into some pretty dangerous territory. I’ve been gored a few times. 🙂 |
Out From Under the Umbrella 
March 28, 2011 at 2:31 pm
That's a good one. 🙂 I've got a few gore scars, too, which were, I thought at the time, marks earned in the service of the Most High, instead of puncture wounds to my theological bubble world. Dunning-Kruger effect, in my case, for sure.
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March 28, 2011 at 3:26 pm
::snerk:: The critical first step for any sort of right action is to make sure you understand the situation.
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March 28, 2011 at 3:38 pm
@bklanyon:Ditto! Now I just see them as ugly pock marks from ill advised butt-inskiness.======================================================@Michael Mock,I deserve that ::snerk:: Thus the goring. When you're a fundamentalist you do just what the DEA officer did. You don't bother checking out the landscape. My heavens, you have the authority of God backing you!
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March 28, 2011 at 4:20 pm
Excellent! I finally figured out there is a difference between martyrdom for being a Christian and getting my ass kicked for being a jerk for Christ. sigh….
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March 28, 2011 at 7:33 pm
Well, I snerked because laughing out loud in my cubicle tends to invite questions.
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March 28, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Sorry about the cubicle. 😦
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March 28, 2011 at 10:14 pm
Luckly, my personal holy spirit erred on the side of caution most times. I didn't have to evangelize unless the spirit so led. My non-charismatic evangelical friends didn't have such a nice cop-out.
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March 28, 2011 at 10:42 pm
@s-p:Definitely a difference there, glad you've figured that out. Most evangelicals don't. Though I don't think you're an evangelical, are you?==================================================@prairienymph:No such luck. We were guilted into the great commission. We were supposed to be sharing Christ at every opportunity. Even if you had to chase the person down and sit on their hands so they couldn't stick their fingers in their ears. It did NOT stop them from singing, "LALALALALA" really loudly, though.
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March 28, 2011 at 10:43 pm
I did use the cop-out that I wasn't gifted for evangelism. 🙂
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March 29, 2011 at 1:51 am
D'Ma, I was a door knocking, tract handing-out, conversation starting fool for about 20 years in the church of Christ. I have "the badge". 🙂
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March 29, 2011 at 3:26 pm
Love it. Too funny.
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March 29, 2011 at 7:19 pm
Love it!
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April 1, 2011 at 7:27 pm
What I was going to say was covered by others, so I'm just going to say "Heh." (That is internet code for laughter. It indicates that I'm sitting at my computer laughing. It's more heartfelt than a "LOL" and not as annoying as a "ROFLMAO.");-)
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April 1, 2011 at 7:51 pm
Glad you could have a hearty "heh" with us, Aletheia.Note to self: Aletheia finds ROFLMAO annoying…..;~)
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April 2, 2011 at 11:03 am
Nah. I really don't. I was just trying to be clever and silly. Didn't work out as well as I'd hoped.:)
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April 2, 2011 at 11:20 am
Yeah, me too. Hahahahahaha:-)
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