He’s a pro. He’s the best. Just ask him.
He’s as racist, bigoted, and misogynistic as people feel. We need an exterminator to take care of the problem.
Trouble is, nobody’s asking, and even if they are they don’t care about the answer, how he’s going to do this.
So you’ve hired an exterminator, you’ve given him carte blanche to deal with the problem. You leave it to him. He says, “Believe me, I’m the best. No raccoon has ever gotten the better of me. Raccoons are losers and I’m a winner.”
You trot off to work, leaving him to fix your problem, without even asking for a plan of action. You carry on, blissfully, throughout your day knowing when you get home those damned raccoons will be gone. Oh, happy day.
The exterminator calls you, just after lunch to tell you that the problem has been resolved. He’s taken care of it and those pesky raccoons won’t bother you any more. He’s left a bill in your mailbox.
On your drive home you’re singing along with the radio – rocking out, actually – excited to get home to your peaceful, beautiful, raccoon-free home.
You turn down your street and there are people standing out in front of what used to be your house. The only thing left standing is the mailbox. It’s been raised. Flattened to the ground. He used explosives and blew it to smithereens.
Sure enough, just as he said, there’s a bill in the mailbox. It’s more than you can afford. And he blew your damned house up! You’re not paying that bill.
Except you ring him up to tell him so and he says that, yes, you will pay the bill. He did what was requested. You said you wanted those raccoons gone, and you wanted them gone pronto. He did that. You never asked how that would be accomplished. You didn’t discuss the terms of any agreement. Only that you agreed to pay him to get rid of the raccoons which he did.
And if you don’t pay the bill he’ll see you in court!
May the gods help us all. Ain’t America great?
